Sunday, June 06, 2010

The matrimonial bug..

This is so strange. A few years ago, I was on the other side of the coast, the single eligible and "homely and comely" girl waiting for a suitable alliance from all similar boys. The saga of my groom search started when I was a very naive 21 and looked at life through the romance novels I read hidden from my mother's eagle eyes. My suitable boy was there and he was just around the corner. I like many others before me was ready to get married to the first boy my family showed me, because that was how it was for everyone.

The first alliance that came was from a highly educated fellow who was getting his Phd from a prestigious university in Texas. I spun all the dreams of a naive girl, goaded along by my parents, who didnt know any better. Needless to say that fizzled out due to the constantly changing mind of the groom in question and my better senses that kicked in telling me, I don't need a fickle minded companion. It was only after getting to America, to another university in America, that I learned the truth of the matter being he had a girl friend hidden away. His parents wanted to tie him down to a "nice mallu warrier* girl " , as his brother had also gone the same route.. Well I was better off single and eligible and homely and comely..

Well .. not exactly. Because now my parents kicked into second gear.they were not accustomed to this scenario. usually no one looks beyond the first proposal. hmm, so next they present me with another warrier boy, whom I am supposed to go and meet someplace in Austin. Well I was still listening to my parents back then and I went there with my roomie Rash. The two of us met the boy and his parents at the South indian restaurant. The only memories I came back with is that of the food and how good it was. I put my foot down strongly against this proposal, and my parents put both their foots and hands down in favor. However this was not destined to be

Still in second gear, they managed to find a namboodiri* lad, working for a big firm in California. He seemed like my ticket to a happily married and settled and contented life. My family was ready to write down the marriage date as well. But by now, I was not a very obedient girl and had my transgressions from the laid down rules now and then. So I and the namboodiri lad decided to meet up first. I am glad we did that , for it was a case of oil and water. When we converyed the decision to our parents, it wasn't unlike the Tsunami that hit the coasts later that year.

After this, I was extremely clear that any alliances would follow only after my studies were completed and, I found a job. I was not content being dependent on any individual , emotianally and financially. This was probably the start to a new me. Following my graduation, my dad who was sitting on hot cakes started sending me proposals... one after another.. Since I had already crossed the so called marriageable age and was tainted with the "US ki chori" (girl from US) label, the field narrowed down considerably.. The choices out there were not very appealing.. from a male chauvinist, who expected me to drop everything to be at his beck and call, to the geek in bleechers, who was content looking at the animals in the safari and taking pictures of them, to the player, who was out the scope by talking to multiple girls at a time..

Finally I met my prince charming, and am living my life happily.. I was reminded of the whole situation a few months ago, when it was time to get my brother married. But needless to say, he fell right into the normal scenario.. saw and talked to one girl and she is going to be his life partner.. a very sensible lad and sensible girl! Wishing both of you a very long and prosperous life together :)

* specific castes in Kerala

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